Keep in mind: This is not a report of “news;” we don’t want you to get too worried about something that is right now definitely just a rumor. And also, this is just one fan, our very own Matt Hoeppner’s opinion …

Rumors swirled amongst the twitterverse and social media outlets on Wednesday that AJ Pierzynski had tested positive for a banned substance and was currently in the process of appealing the failed test and was looking at a 50 game suspension.
While something as specific as a failed test is new, there have been whispers for several weeks and maybe even months that AJ must be on steroids because 30-something year old catchers just don’t have crazy breakout seasons.  No one seems to remember Carlton Fisk’s 37 home run 100+ RBI season of 1985 at age 37, but I digress.
There has been plenty already written and out there about AJ’s season at the plate, check out Fangraphs, Baseball Prospectus, or even here at GSB! for a breakdown of his unlikely season.  I am not here to dispute the numbers, they are what they are and in this day and age that means that there are going to be suspicions of PED’s.  I will only try and lay out some logical facts as to why I would be VERY surprised if it in fact turns out to be true.

AJ has a career high 24 home runs and counting. Credit: ESPN


First off Pierzynski is in a contract year at age 35.  “Now wait,” you might say, “isn’t that a reason that he would be using something?”  No, it isn’t, and the reason is that if a 35 year old catcher gets suspended for using PED’s and is looking for a new team in the off-season, he isn’t likely to find many suitors.  In fact I would argue that his career would likely be over.  Even if he had had a typical season this year, with the lack of depth around the Major Leagues at catcher, he would have found a job for at least next season if not longer.
Secondly, Pierzynski did some work for Fox last year during the playoffs as an analyst on their pre and post-game coverage.  He wasn’t half bad and given his fiery personality there is a real good chance that he could be looking at a future as a TV analyst, whether it be on Fox, ESPN or MLB Network.  However, if he gets caught using PED’s he can kiss that goodbye.
None of the networks are going to employ a known cheater as one of their analysts, no way.  So, in taking PED’s, AJ is jeopardizing both his current job and a potential future job.  That doesn’t seem like it’s worth the risk to me.
Finally, and most importantly, the rumors themselves do not seem to come from any real source and have gone as far as to say that everyone from AJ to Rios to De Aza to Peavy will be suspended.  That would be the largest group of positive tests ever from one testing report and that in and of itself would raise suspicions.  Sounds like a tainted batch to me eh Ryan Braun?  Not only that, but historically the White Sox have been among, if not the cleanest team in baseball.  A few years ago when MLB was first instituting their testing policy the White Sox volunteered to have the entire team tested as a sign that they were clean and would welcome regular testing.  I know that many of the same players are no longer with the team, but AJ was there at the time.
If in fact several of the White Sox players tested positive and are suspended it would be shocking and would be akin to the Black Sox Scandal Part II.  The White Sox medical and training staff is largely made up of the same group of people that has been there for years, I just can’t see something like that happening under their watch.
Does any of this mean that AJ Pierzynski didn’t get caught using PED’s?  No, it doesn’t.  All I am doing is laying out my opinion of why I would be surprised if that was, in fact, the case.  Maybe I am just a fan who doesn’t want to believe it, maybe I am just like the kid in the courtroom in 1920, “Say it aint so Joe, say it aint so.”  Maybe it is all true and I just want it not be so I am building my case or maybe it just doesn’t add up and that is why I don’t believe it.  Maybe I think it sounds like nothing because it all started on some message board by a guy no one knows who claims to have a “friend” at a Chicago radio station that heard a rumor.
“My best friend’s sister’s boyfriend’s brother’s girlfriend heard from this guy who knows this kid who’s going with the girl who saw AJ take PED’s at 31 Flavors last night.”  Maybe…or maybe not.  Time will tell and hopefully somebody, anybody addresses it.  The longer it goes, the more curious it gets.